Make that: Yankees win!

3:35 Ivan the cat sent that last post before I could write it. Albaladejo (need a nickname for him) covers first base as Berroa makes the play in the hole, and the Yankees win 5-1. Hey, it's great to have baseball back.

By the way, stay away from the Web site "soxandpinstripes.com." It's loaded with this "nothing like Red Sox Nation for passion, dedication," blah, blah, blah. Exactly the stuff that makes Red S*x fans the most annoying, insufferable donkeys on earth.

It is at this time that I will point out that the idea of calling a fan base "nation" originated with the Raiders, not the Red S*x. Congratulations, S*x fans. You ripped off your identity from the Raider fans -- easily the dumbest fans on earth.

I'm off to eat ice cream, do laundry and get tickets for Slumdog Millionaire. More later. LET'S GO YANKEES!

Yankees win

3:31: Jon Albaladejo is back in to pitch for the second time. Kay had him in the game in the third, when it was actually Brian Bruney. Whatever. So Kay's not in midseason form either. He doesn't make these mistakes too often. Notice I didn't say "these kind" of mistakes. Writers do that all the time. "These kind." Amazing.

My laptop is now a knee-top. The cat was tired of watching me fry my sperm with the heat from the computer. Now he wants a crack at it. It is not easy typing like this. I want a raise.

3:22: Excellent product placement, as they point out that the soft-serve ice cream being dispensed is Carvel. I think I'll go for ice cream after this. It won't be Carvel.

3:19: Melancon strikes out a hitter by painting the outside corner. Two up, two down. Trying to blog here, and Red S*x fans keep IMing me on Facebook. I actually like these two, though. A little.

3:17: I just realized, the Islanders own the Bridgeport Sound Tigers, who represent my best chance to get a broadcasting job in pro hockey. I love the Islanders!

3:15: Mark Melancon on to pitch for the Yankees. I'm actually going to pay attention. He's a prospect. Could be up this year, from all I've read. Pronounced "muh LAN sin." Kinda like Billy Smith's backup with the Islanders. I hate the Islanders.